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A MyBCTeam Member asked a question 💭
Ladson, SC

I was just wondering about the women out there that have or have not considered or done reconstruction, did you do it for you or for your spouse? Were you considering not doing it and persuaded by someone else to have it done? Whether it be for a whole breast or to make uneven breast even.

June 16, 2013
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A MyBCTeam Member

For me, it was all my decision.

I chose to have reconstruction because:

1. I wanted to maintain my outward appearance without having to use breast forms.

2. I wanted to continue to feel feminine. My husband and I are young (early 30s) and sex is still a big part of our lives. I'm sure we could have made it work if I chose NOT to have reconstruction, however I'm more confident about my body with the reconstruction. And being confident in my body is one of the things about me that turns hubby on. I feel like if I was self-conscious about it... that would be a bigger issue sex wise than the surgery/reconstruction itself.

3. This will sound vain, but I have a young son (he's 4 now) and we spend alot of time at the pool. I wanted to be able to "look normal" when hanging out with all the other 30 something moms at the pool with their toddlers.

I guess reconstruction is generally a "vain" thing, but psychologically, I think it helped. I can look at myself in the mirror in any clothing and feel confident that my body looks "normal". Naked isn't as easy, but 2 years after surgery, they feel more and more like mine. They won't ever replace the real thing, but they no longer feel like blobs strapped to my chest.

I wish you the best as you think through this decision. It's not an easy one. And not everyone gets the results they hope for. But again, it's a decision we all have to make for ourselves.

June 17, 2013
A MyBCTeam Member

I had a bilateral with expanders that are still in. Although not the most comfortable, I'm okay with them. Even losing feeling, I didn't want to lose my body looking like me. I'm very happy with my decision.
I don't have feeling everywhere but my boyfriend knows where I do have feeling. I appreciate it so much that he took the time to figure that out & remember that so some things can feel a bit like they did before.

June 20, 2013
A MyBCTeam Member

I did my reconstruction solely for me. Although I am dating someone, it was not about him at all. I wanted to be able to not have to worry about breast forms and look in a mirror or shower and feel breasts there (even if they aren't real). I had a bilateral mastectomy with tissue expanders and now silicone implants. I like them a lot. I am still deciding on whether to do nipple reconstruction. But honestly, when I wear clothes, I almost forget and that makes me happy.

June 19, 2013
A MyBCTeam Member

I think if I were younger I may have opted for resconstruction. I did just wanted to add that I do Not feel any loss of my femininity without my breasts. I was afraid I might, but it must come from the inside.

June 17, 2013
A MyBCTeam Member

I had a bilateral with no reconstruction. I knew I would never feel the same and I just didn't want to put in the extra healing time. No spouse at present to worry about, but if I was still married I think him wanting me to have reconstruction would be a good reason not to!!! Now you know why I'm not married!

June 16, 2013

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