Bring someone with you. If you don't want someone you know to go with you, some facilities offer volunteers to sit with you and take notes for you. You can also tape record the visit, with the permission of the doctor.
Most helpful to me was discussion of ALL the options, the doctor's reasons for the recommended course of action, and their explanation of why other doctors might do things differently.
It's also good to understand what will happen down the line, past the immediate initial course of treatment. I wished I had asked more about that. It would not have changed my course of treatment, but I would not have been surprised at each new stage.
I also wished I got the oncologist's view of integrative therapy. I didn't end up using any, and I was fine, but I've heard other people that have enjoyed using it.
If you forget to ask something, you can always ask later.
Finally, now that I'm a year out from treatment, I have to tell you that it was not nearly as bad as I feared it would be.
It's great that you are so well prepared!

Get a journal! Write down all your questions and answers. Keep a page for your medications list, procedures and dates, appointments, doctors info. As much as you can in one journal. I started that and it has become SO helpful!

Ask about NewAdjuvantOnline.com where he or she can tell you what benefit (if any) certain treatments will give you. I was under the impression Tamoxifen would give me a 50% benefit but it turned out to be 1%. ONE PERCENT!! No two women are alike and you should be given the chance to make educated decisions about the drugs you choose to take or not. Treatment can and should be individualized nowadays but sometimes you have to demand that.

I wrote down my questions as I thought of them and then brought to each visit. I agree with what was posted by Jennifern. What is recommended and why? What other options might you consider? I asked what my onc would recommend to me if I was her sister. We discussed my statistical odds of survival and what to expect from treatment and thereafter. My onc was super patient with all my questions. Most of my appts lasted more than an hour!

Yes. Write down everything. You will forget. So information coming at one time. Stay as calm as you can it does help.