I'm really very thankful I found this site. It is definitely a community where people "get it."

I have been annoyed by people's comments as well. I decided to tell my customers (Avon business) as I didn't know if I would be able to keep up. Most of them are older people and very kind and considerate.
It is the younger people who don't get it and I thought any little information might help educate them - breast cancer is everywhere. And then I remind myself that I knew very little before my cancer. I've learned through this blog and through Gilda's Club Group Support meetings how different the breast cancers are and how different the treatments.
None of us want to be judged, just loved and supported.
Now that I have a good hair back (finished chemo and radiation May 2013) people think I am all over it.
If anyone asks, I say I am improving slowly from fatigue and cognitive issues. I figure it might be them someday, or a close loved one, and knowledge is power.
I've had the experience of raising a Type 1 diabetic diagnosed at age 3. He looked like a well child. No one knew the great struggles. He his now 41 yrs old and very ill for reasons too long to explain. But... he said to me a few years ago when he still looked well, that he would get a whole lot more respect if he was in a wheel chair - something visible. I understood it well at the time he said that. I understand it on a different level now.
Bless us all and give us strength and patience not to judge just as we do not want to be judged. Love to you!

I am 7 years a survivor of breast cancer. But I clearly remember being told things as you have been sharing. And I still get it sometimes from strangers. The worst part of it all was I still sometimes think "what if". You know, what if I hadn't done this, or maybe I should have done this. Those things still ring in my ears. I am so proud of all of you, to have found this site and to be sounding off. It is so healthy.

Ladies, my heart really goes out to all of you. You are going through so much without well-meaning friends. We can say they are trying to help, but many times they are not helping. Some folks are just cruel. Pray for them that the Lord would speak to their hearts.
I can certainly understand why many ladies don't share this journey with others. It can be disconcerting and discouraging. TAKE HEART!! GOD KNOWS EVERY DETAIL OF WHAT YOU ARE GOING THROUGH!! ALL OF THIS WITH THE CANCER DID NOT TAKE HIM BY SURPRISE! AND HIS WORD SAYS.. HE WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU NOR FORSAKE YOU!!

RUN TO HIM FOR COMFORT AND GUIDANCE!!

I am only three weeks out from the diagnosis and haven't had any surgery yet. I have shared what is going on with many people. What I had to do was to ask the Lord to please help me be gracious when they told their "stories" or "gave me some advice" and then please take away from my mind what I didn't need to think about. We have enough information going into our brains and decisions to make without our brain being clouded by "stories".

So, I say trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding and He will guide your paths. Psa. 105:3 I do have to pray to discern His voice from all others.

It is so cool to be watching how God has led me to different situations. He has me with a breast cancer specialist, that's all she does. He has led me to a plastic surgeon who the breat cancer doctor trusts because of his outcomes in surgery. The breast cancer surgeon had me get an MRI and I am so thankful for that because it showed another lump in the same breast. I have had two opinions from surgeons and plastic surgeons. Of course, they can't and won't tell us what to do. We have to make that decision. But, each has given me some things to think about. I am so thankful for that. And, just when I need it, the Lord sends a text, a devotional, an email with some thoughts, or a phone call to let me know He is working through others to encouragement me in this journey.

Focus more on what's right and less on what's wrong. It will help your day.

I love this: I can't! You (GOD) can!! You (GOD) can do it through me!!! Phillipians 4:13

I so appreciate this site. What a great place to be able to share--with those who truly are in the same boat!! True empathy!!

That is one reason I decided not to tell everybody but who I wanted to know. I think people know now but I do not want to talk to THEM about it. I told a close group of friends only. I catch people looking at my chest at times wondering what has been done. I know people are well meaning but they have no clue what we are going through.