Hey Janell,

I'm in the same boat as you. Only I'm about 2.5 yrs out from diagnosis and my husband and I just started talking about maybe trying for another baby. I didn't have any embryos frozen (miscarried during treatment, so that wasn't an option), so we're hoping and praying that the "good old fashioned way" works for us.

The good news is that I know several women personally that have had good luck conceiving after cancer. One of my very good cancer buddies just stopped Tamoxifen at the 2 year mark and got pregnant 2 months later. It happens more often than doctors sometimes lead us to believe, particularly for us survivors that were very young at time of DX (under the age of 35).

If you'd like to talk to more young survivors, particularly some that have had surrogates, try the young survivor boards. www.youngsurvival.org (I think).

In terms of deciding if you should stop Tamoxifen, I'd encourage you to talk to your oncologist. Depending on your oncotype score, your onc might have a variety of opinions. If you are highly hormone positive... he might suggest surrogacy. If you're middle of the road in terms of being ER+/PR+, he might pat you on the back and say "it's OK to take the risk".

I still haven't made my decision on if I'm ready to try again... but I think I might. It's a scary idea. It is scary to think "what if it comes back and there is a child that will be left without a mom?" But there also has to be a point when you and your husband decide that regardless of what the future holds, this is something you want to do.

I wish you all the best. Good luck with your decision.

While conceiving after treatment was not an option for me, I have a good friend who got hormone active BC stage II while she was pregnant with her first child. The doctors wanted her to terminate the pregnancy (she was nearing the end of the first trimester) because they wanted to do surgery and start chemo right away. She refused, but did agree to give birth at 8 months. The baby was delivered by c-section and she immediately had surgery to remove the tumor. A week later she was on chemo. After the usual surgery, chemo, radiation and then 2 years of tamoxifen, she conceived her second child, who was carried to term and born without complications. That was 25 years ago! BTW.... both children grew up healthy and graduated from college. My friend remains healthy and cancer free! So yes, it is possible!

My husband and I froze embryos as well. I am 32 and just started my tamoxifen journey 3 weeks ago. We are strongly considering surrogacy for a first child. My deepest concern is not being able to carry a child at the end of all this or if the BC returns because of the hormones (triple+). Then I will have waited all this time for nothing. We've done some preliminary research and independent surrogates run between $40k - $60k when all is said and done.

they did adopt them..

You have to talk to your OB-GYN if a male, get a second opinion from a female, depends on your stage don't be discouraged, you need some expert advice and I would seek it out, even if going out of your medical group..there is so much new medical protocol out there, especially if child-bearing age and if they so no, adoption is still an option..I also would like to say Foster Children can fill some what of a void, my step-daughter could not have children, did invitro twice, very expensive so she took in 2 foster children (not babies) 2 & 4 and now 16 & 18 (graduating in June)has not been an easy road but fulfilling, for them..